How to Discover Someone’s Hidden Personality
A guy fell madly in love with a girl.
'I am ready to do anything for you. Just be mine.'
The girl thought for some moments. To be so loved felt magical.
'Tell me: Who do you love the most in the world?' She asked.
'You.' He replied. 'And my mother.'
'Fine. I want to make sure that I am the only person in the world who you love. No other. So, denounce your mother and promise me that you will never meet her again and never talk to her again. Ever. And then I will be your's.'
The guy knelt on the floor solemnly, his eyes looking deep into the eyes of the girl.
'I promise to you that from today I denounce my mother for ever. I will never see her again and never talk to her again.'
She smiled. 'This was just a test.'
'You see? I really can do anything for you.'
'The contrary.' She answered calmly. 'You can do anything for yourself, not for me or anyone else. Not even for your mother. If you can leave her for me, you will also leave me for others. If you can do anything to get what you want, you will stop at nothing to get what you want. Besides, if you still want to be with me although I asked you to do something so ugly, you really must be very sick in your mind. That says a lot about you!'
We human beings are like an onion, wrapped under layers and layers of skins, and hiding reservoir of flavour, colour, smell and sting that we ourselves aren't entirely aware of.
We hide ourselves without knowing what we're hiding.
We reveal ourselves without knowing how we're revealing ourselves.
Many times we don't even know who we are until others discover us.
But like an onion, you don't need to separate each layer to discover its whole. Simply cut its bottom and top part off and you get a fair idea of what it is from inside. To discover someone's true personality we should pay attention to their exposed areas:
To discover someone's true personality:
- Observe how they talk about other people. Respectfully? Insultingly? Irritatedly? Demeaningly?
The way they talk about them to you is usually the way they talk about you to them.
- If they talk too much about others to you, chances are they will about you too to others. If they never talk about others to you, chances are they won't about you too.
- Observe how they treat animals or think about them. Usually good genuine people treat animals, (not only animals but everyone) with kindness, care and love even if they aren't their pets.
- Observe how they talk about their workplace and colleagues. Do they bitch and tell you how it sucks to work? People who love their work are full of positivity and have great appreciative things to share. Negative people hate their work and will start pouring vitriol at the first opportunity, although they will also be the first and loudest ones to tell you they are very happy and very positive.
Also, it is very telling how people put on a mask when they are in company of their boss/superior/friend and how they fling it off once he goes away.
- Listen to how they talk about their partners. A good deal of hidden personality springs to surface when someone gets an opportunity to discuss their partner at a time and place where they are sure their partner will never discover what was being said about them.
- Observe their body language and style of talking. Genuine people usually do not have anything to hide or reveal and feel easy in their skin and will appear quite the same whether alone or in front of crowd, strangers, known people or at home. On the contrary, if you see people's faces and expression dramatically change (almost as if they flipped a switch. This is a red flag.) when they are alone in front of others, they may be having a hidden side to their personality and adopt fake expressions that change according to people and situations they encounter.
- Observe how they treat older people, poor people, the less disadvantaged people. Anyone who can hold such people in contempt and sneer at them, can't empathise with their pains and problems has likely a rough, cold, cruel, selfish, unsympathising heart that focuses more on material benefits. Genuine, kind hearted people usually treat all people with respect under all circumstances.
- What hobbies, passions, likes and dislikes they have? For example if someone says they are very respectful of different cultures and tell you they hate eating a particular cuisine or language they might be hiding their real feelings about the issue.
- How they talk about their enemies/ rivals and adversaries. Everyone hate their enemies, but how they hate them and if they still acknowledge their merit, and how prepared are they to avenge or forgive them tells a lot about their inner sides.
- How they react under stress and disappointment, in situations of power and control, and how kind, just and friendly they continue to be with someone who cannot help them anymore or who rejected them, or insulted them. This one is very important. I have seen many many many people fail this test.
You see? Discovering hidden personality is a challenge even for the person himself. But if we know where to look for cracks and interpret the signals peeping through the crevices, there is a fair chance we can understand what's going on beneath those intricate layers.
But that's just my opinion. Thank you for reading.